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Why You Should Never Get Married

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Did the title get your attention? Oh, it’s fine. I totally get why you’d open this blog. I mean, why would a married woman who looks so happy in social media pictures post a blog with such a ridiculous title? Simple. Because it’s true.
Now before all of you lash out at me, here me out for a second. Allow me to tell you the reason why.

1. You will lose your privacy.

Privacy? What’s that? That word will never exist once you are married. Sure people tell you that you can have your private space in a while,BUT you have to tell your partner what you did the whole time,like literally everything about each minute that had passed. Might as well just carry your partner around rather than tell a whole narrative for one hour just because you weren’t with each other for a minute. It’s not that your partner is jealous but they are just nosy and they want to know everything. Also, forget about your ‘private and cozy moments’ in the toilet. Telling them that you are in the toilet and doing number 2 is no excuse! They come and go as they please so (what the fudge) might as well leave that toilet door wide open!

2. Shared bank accounts.

Do you love shopping? Forget it. Forget everything you know about Louboutin, Jimmy Choo,Gucci, Chanel. From now on,all you’ll ever know is H and M, Primark and start considering Zara as a luxury. Be prepared though to have a house full of “toys” that you do not even know how to operate. Oculus, PS4, Gear S3 to name a few. (Not even sure if those are the right names) You think it’s not fair? Oh, why yes, of course, it’s not fair! Trust me though, having these toys is a must for your sanity’s sake.

3. Master the art of cooking.

You have a baby to feed now. Oh,you didn’t know? Having a husband is like having a baby, equally cute but just more hard-headed! You need to prepare food for them, wash their clothes, entertain them (if this does not work, give them toys. See #2.) and make sure they have everything they need else they’ll throw a major tantrum and it will not a great day for you,my friend. Once in a while, he will help you cook and do the chores but beware, there is always a price. Nothing in this world is free. (Ahem,toys)
That’s not all. There are so many things that you have to do and the expectations are extremely high. You are put on a pedestal and just like that, after a day of being married, everyone expects you to have grown thrice as much wiser. Although, since you are constantly getting a tough training every day, this is but given really.
Tough right? Whoever told you that getting married is a piece of cake surely is daydreaming. There is nothing easy about getting married! As a matter of fact, it only goes tougher especially when you have kids. But just like having kids,getting married has its ups too.
When you are sick, you know that someone will take good care of you. When you are sad, you know that someone will do everything just to make you smile. When you are tired, you know that someone will give you a bear hug and just like that, everything is better.
True, everything is better when you have a husband or a wife. You might feel like the world is on your shoulders. but it’s okay. Why? Because you know you have a constant support system. One that will never fail,  nor desert you. One that will always have your back, no matter what.
You might lose the privileges that you used to have when you were single, but you have so much more to gain. Nothing can ever compare to what you will get in exchange. The love that you will get is more precious than anything else in this world.
Marriage is never easy. I will never take that back, what I will tell you though is that in the end, it is worth it. It is worth all the headache and frustration because, in this world, you know that there is only one person who can make you happy and that is the one you married.
Love is always worth it. 
– Hannah Oliveros
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Blogs, Uncategorized

It’s the Thought that Counts

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“Sharing is caring”, may seem like one the world’s most cliché adage.  (Time is gold tops it.) We hear it almost every day of our life. We know that we ought to help one another. We ought to share our blessing. We know that we ought to help without expecting anything in return.

But why is it so hard to do?

Last Sunday, July 10, 2016, my husband and I attended the mass. The sermon that father gave was about Sharing. He spoke about sharing your time, talent and treasure. This concept is not new to me. I have always loved helping people. When I was younger, I would go up the mountains, to far-flung places even, just to help our less fortunate brothers and sisters through teaching them or to simply just giving them small gifts. The children in the area cannot go to school because the nearest one is about 3 hours walk from their area and mind you, the way there is not easy. You have to cross mountains, walk through slippery slopes and even walk through a bridge made of two bamboo trees/stems tied together.

Every time I go to those areas, I feel like I was always hanging for dear life. Apart from those far-flung areas, I have been to areas where armed rebels have devastated so the chances of them coming back is not remote and, ‘lo and behold,it did happen once or twice. I know it is dangerous, I know it is tiring but there is always something that pulls me back every time I feel like I can not do it anymore.

At first, I thought it was my love for the children that motivates me. Seeing them smile made me really happy but while listening to the sermon last Sunday, I realized it was not just their smile that motivated me. It was the joy of giving that was filling me. The happiness that I felt seeing the kids smile and knowing that I have been an instrument of the happiness that they feel overwhelmed me. It feels so good to know that even though I was just doing a small thing, it made them glad and it mattered to them.

However, when we (my husband and I) moved here in Denmark, I felt like it is hard to share our treasure with other people. Honestly, my husband and I are not rich. We live a comfortable life but we are not rich. Apart from that, Denmark is a very expensive country! As much as we want to give to the less fortunate, financial constraints limit the help we can give. We are not complaining, though. We know that we are really lucky and we are so blessed to be living the life that we have. And since we feel really blessed, we want to pass it forward. We want to help others who are in need and share our blessings.

So my husband and I thought of ways to help others without the thought of financial constraints limit us. We accepted the fact that we cannot share TREASURE as much as we want so we focused on sharing our TIME and TALENT.

How did we do it? 

Simple. When we have friends who ask us for help in moving heavy things in their unit, we go and help. We offer our time to look after their kids if they are busy. We spend time with them and just do nothing but listen if they are going through tough times. When they are celebrating a milestone in their life, my husband volunteers as photographer/videographer and me as host/emcee. No buts, no excuses. Expecting nothing in return.

I know what these are just little things but it does not matter. What matters to my husband and I is that we are doing it from the heart. We just want to help, and if these are just what we can do, then be it. At the end of the day, it is always the thought that counts.

 

Photo credit: cogdogblog via Foter.com / CC BY